To care for kids' mental health, parents should talk less and listen more, studies say. Here's how

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Research shows that teens are more likely to turn to their parents when they need support rather than peers or professionals.

Credit: File photo

During adolescence, parents can be quick to offer suggestions and advice, but judgement-free listening is the way to start a conversation, said Charmain Jackman, a psychologist with the Ad Council.

Parents must stay in communication with their kids and watch for changes, she said.

"Changes in moods, changes in eating habits, changes in friendships, isolating more, spending more time away from family and away from their friends, losing interest in activities that they previously were really excited to be part of," Jackman said. "Those are some really important markers for parents to notice."

Sometimes it's tough for parents to separate the effects of puberty from worsening social and emotional mental health, but parents should want their kids to come to them for accurate information, she said.

"I think teens definitely gravitate towards their friends, but there's a recognition that their friends don't always have the best information," Jackman said. "Or, sometimes, their friendship groups become a place where they don't feel themselves. They don't think they can be authentic."

The Ad Council is advocating for families and showing caregivers that "listening is a form of love," Jackman said.

"So your role is to listen," Jackman said. "Listen without judgment, and, at some point, ask, 'Would you like me to share with you what I'm hearing? Would you like to share with you some thoughts that I have about this?' So that you keep those lines of communication open."

The Ad Council's sound-it-out-together resources for parents include conversation starters and guides on listening to help children learn to work through their own problems.